You will die you little piece of crap, oh yes you will, and I will do it.
Sitting in my living room on Friday night I hear the night time noises out my window, there was an obnoxious display of lightning and thunder going on most of the night. I was a bit surprised that there was a cricket that was chirping really loud outside. It seemed that there was only one, so I thought it was a bit out of character. Not that I am a cricket specialist mind you, but I am pretty smart.
After about an hour of this nonsense I finally realized that this cricket was not outside, but inside. See, I told you I was smart! Anyways, I proceed to go to the area of this noise and for every 2-3 steps I would take the chirping would stop. After about 2 seconds it would start up again. Well I traced it all the way to the garage. It was so loud at that point that I do not think it knew I was in there. I look around, and you will be amazed to know that there is no crap on the floor of the garage, in fact you could probably eat off the floor in there my husband keeps it so clean. I do not park my car in there, for no reason other than is is the equivalent of a winter playground for Bud. He can play hockey or baseball and not break anything.
but, I digress......
So after a few moments of looking around and moving the baseball bat rack, out of the corner of my eye I see it. It is HUGE! I am not kidding. I have seen plenty of crickets in my day, but this one ate his Wheaties, and Twinkies and the kitchen sink! I was looking for something to put a quick end to his ever loving life, but the only thing I could find besides a few toys was a hammer. Please try to contain yourself. I am aware that the thought of me chasing a cricket around the garage floor with a hammer is pretty amusing, but it was all that I had. After about 50 smacks I got him. I think his size was part of the easy to kill process. So adios cricket,
After that it was quiet in the house and quiet outside that the lightning and thunder was really enjoyable.
After the first game it is......
mommyrox 1
cricket 0
enjoy life!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment