Friday, June 30, 2006

OH HAIR NO!

I have these things called standing appointments. On certain days of certain months I am scheduled to be places to get things done. Well, yesterday I had my standing appointment with my hairdresser to get my frizzy mop head under control.
I show up at 5:00pm right on the smacker. I say to the front desk "I am here to see Julie for a 5:00 appointment". The gal looks in the computer and says "Oh don't you mean 5:15". I politely say "no I have a 5:00. I come right from work". She said that Julie was out for a minute and will be right back. Ok so there was a slight lag. I am ok. I wait. Now my appointments are not a quickie cut, style & go. Nooooo I am much too freakish for that. I have to have the color, caramalizing and highlight. A hair dressers dream. Right? Not with my nightmare hair. Ok, back to the salon. Julie walks in and says Hi in a way that implies that she is puzzled to see me. She says " Are you here for a cut?" I was like aahh no. I am here for my 8 week color. She says ok, and proceeds to go to the counter. Comes back and says there has been a mistake. I clear my throat and say ummm a mistake? She senses my bit of edginess, and says yes you see my booking column is next to Changs and you were booked with Chang. I start to melt in to a mode of what the f$#& and clearly did not hear a word of what she said other than blah blah booked blah blah Chang blah blah OK? Shaking my self back to reality I, like that kid in 10th grade who was sleeping in American History when the teacher called him to answer a question.... goes What? So she repeated herself in the condensed version with a lot of sincerity. I am booked. Chang can do your hair, or we can reschedule. Ok Reschedule is not an option. I am too anal. Chang? Is she any good. Reassured that she is a master stylist I think well gosh. I can't walk out. I have a 2 hour slot and she would loose money. It is not Changs fault. It's not Julies fault. So I say OK. That was my BIGGEST MISTAKE!
It is now 5:30 and we are 1/2 hour behind schedule. She looks at my hair and says what'chu want to do? I say the same as last time. She said OK. So she mixes her stuff and gets going. Note to any hair dressers: DO NOT WEAR CHARM BRACELETS WHEN YOU CUT HAIR. As lovely and sentimental as they may be to you they are annoying to me (and it's all about me) the customer sitting in your chair with my ear next to it for 2 hours! Sorry.... I'll keep going. She does her thing and proceeds to carry on about the inept receptionist and asking how I want it styled. I say just a trim. So now the coloring is done and I am in the sink getting caramalized (which is not a yummy as it sounds) and her next appointment is in. The next girl is 1/2 hour early she is a new mom out with out child looking to relax in the salon. My thought..... been there done that I understand. Not Chang she is in a hurry so that darn bracelet is clanging faster in my ear and she is rinsing my hair as if there is a prize for being the fastest and the hardest on my skull. OUCH! I get to the chair and here it comes the scissors and the bracelet. Cling clang cling clang. I am thinking that this will never end. I am in hair hell. What have I done to deserve this? Then I hear the hair dryer. All the noise is getting louder because in the world of Chang's hair dressing you con not have anything louder than her charm bracelet. My eyes are closed and my brain is doing an internal scream AAARRRRHHHH! Then.... it is quiet. She says "I done. Open your eye" I pause for a minute. Open my eyes and take a deep breath in. Umm Ok Not excited, but it is done I am all set. I walk out to the desk to find the part-time asshat that screwed up my appointment in the first place just arriving for her shift. She gets the billing sheet and I was given some free shampoo and conditioner. Thanks a lot (can you hear the scarcasim) She rings me up I noticed that once again she screwed up. She did not bill me for the caramalizing that is $50. You see their bill sheets have 2 sides and she missed one side. I say OK pay my bill and schedule my next appointment. Before I leave I say I am with Julie next time right? She says yes. Then muttering something again about the columns being next to each other. I became the Devil in Parada when I said I don't care about the columns I care that I am with Julie. She just said yes.
So this morning I get up shower and go to work with slightly damp hair. After all it is Friday and 1/2 the office will be out. Since my hair is dark to begin with, when it is wet is traditionally dark. Well I went to the ladies room and by chance took a look in the mirror before going to the ladies sanctuary, and came to a complete halt. My hair was about 10 shades darker than normal and the highlights were more of a tiger color than caramel. SHIT. I AM STILL IN HAIR HELL.
What have I done to deserve this? I eat my vegetables, I go to bed on time, Am I being punished for not telling the girl she forgot to charge me. Well with hair like this who would pay for it? So here I sit a week behind in my work with horrible hair.

p.s. who is the idiot that came up with the industrial strength glue for the snack pack puddings. I took one of Buds for lunch today, and I could not open it without using a knife. How is my child supposed to open that?

I think I need to go to bed and start all over.

1 comment:

La Dolce Vita said...

Oh crap, what is it with hair? I totally forgot the Snarks advice and went and got my hair all cut off too......consulting the calendar, I see that the timing falls right when her advice would say not to do anything drastic....it'll grow, right?

What is carmalizing? It sounds yummy!