Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Sorry!

First to my hubs....
I am sorry I am sick all of the time. I know when we got married we said in sickness and in health. I did not realize that the sick days would be far greater than the healthy ones. I am sorry that the sickness has been so long. Never once have you complained and I am sorry that you got the raw end of the deal. I am sorry my medical expenses have taken up almost all of what money we had for "fun" stuff, and I am sorry that you have to deal with it all of the time.
Second to Bud.....
I am sorry that mommy is sick all of the time. I am sorry that when you want to go out and play I can't take you all of the time. I am sorry that when you want to ride your bike or rollerblades that you have to do it in the driveway, because I can't go out this time of year. I am sorry that mommy sometimes can't even get up and read you a book because I have a hard time breathing. I am sorry that at the last minute I have to change our plans when I get sick.
Third to my friends......
I am sorry for endlessly detailing how crappy I feel most of the time. I am sorry for being that "friend".

Here is your free pass. All of you. If I have annoyed you enough and you are sick and tired of me being sick and tired all of the time here is your chance. I am not going to be getting better. I have an illness that will never go away. I have to deal with it daily and it sucks. I do not want you to have to deal with it, but part of being around me is knowing that everything I do has a direct impact on my illness. No matter what I eat, drink or the meds I have to take. The activities I can do or not do. Where and when I can be outside.

I have taken some time away from this blog in order to get things in order. In order to figure out what I need to do in my life. So here is it out in the open. Here is your chance. I will not hold any grudges.

This is what I needed to do so that I can now......
enjoy life

2 comments:

La Dolce Vita said...

geez woman, do you seriously think you need to say you are sorry to any of us for your being sick? you might better apologize for being a nut instead. you are loved, loved, loved and you never need to apologize for what you are afflicted with. you spread more love and joy, feeling as crappy as you do, than most any other person i know, sick or well...and I also do not notice a lot of complaining from you, so give yourself a little break there chica. if you were a drag to hang out with, i wouldn't hang out with you...or at least i wouldn't -hang out with you and read your blog since we don't get to hang out that much in person as it is...but that has everything to do with the craziness of life and nothing to do with not wanting to hang out with you...speaking of which, when are we going to hang out?

snarkalupagus said...

I echo LDV...of everyone I know, you complain probably the least, especially with the raw deal you got with the Sickness Stick. Never, ever, ever, apologize for being you, or for being tired and feeling like shit occasionally (or even often!!). Your friends love you endlessly, in sickness and in health, just like your marriage vows. When you need something, you reach out, and don't apologize. If every person with a chronic condition was as good at living around it as you are, the world would be a sunnier place. You are loving and loved even more, every day, even when you're too tired to move.